I dream of another you, the one who would never leave me alone to pick up the scattered pieces from the wreckage of a broken heart. The one who would choose his words carefully because he knows, I always remember. I never forget, even when he does. The one who would keep his promises, and when he could not, he would mend everything.

I dream of another you, the one who would never disrespect me. The one who would never make me feel insecure and ugly. The one who would never even think about another girl when he is with me. The one who understands that the worst mistake a man could ever make is letting her woman feel unworthy.

I dream of another you, the one who would never hurt me. Wait, he would hurt me eventually, but when he does, he would realize how it distances us, and he would try anything to be back close.

I dream of another you, the one who would never make me change into another person. The one who would still love me despite my flaws AND my plus. The one who would move mountain if he has to. The one who, at least, would leave anything he is doing just to come see me if I really need him the utmost.

I dream of another you, the one who would never ruin me.

kenapa kamu lagi lagi dan lagi menghancurkan hati saya? kamu pikir hati saya ini apa? lego yang bisa kamu bangun dan hancurkan berkalikali? kamu pikir saya ini apa? malaikat yang akan memaafkan semua kesalahan yang berkali kali kamu ulang?

saya bukan apapun yang ada di pikiran kamu. saya memang tidak gampang pecah, namun sekali pecah, akan selalu ada bekasnya.

kamu pikir memaafkan itu gampang? kamu pikir mengumpulkan dan menyatukan semua kepingan itu mudah?

saya berdarah sampai kering saat melakukan itu semua,

tanya para pecahan itu, akan terlihat bercak merah hasil kamu sayat dan robek berkali-kali.


itu hati saya.

yang kamu bilang kamu jaga.

yang kamu bilang tidak akan kamu hancurkan.

namun nyatanya? kamu menggenggam hati saya terlalu erat sampai saya tidak bisa bernafas, lalu kamu renggangkan ketika saya hampir mati, hanya untuk meremukkannya lagi.

Revlon Colorstay Moisture Stain

Hola! Bought this on Changi because it was the cheapest product that I did not already have HIKS PLEASE SOMEONE BE MY SPONSOR. I have the stain on shade 010 LA Exclusive, which is pink that is reaaally pink.


So, this stain is too sticky for me. It feels like there’s a very pigmented honey poured in my lips 🙁 It is pigmented, however, since it is sticky, everytime I munch, it forms a sorta-clump and I have to re-apply it.


It is toooo stickyy although it lasts longer than Bodyshop’s (the one I often use) I don’t think I’ll be repurchasing it :”

pro: pigmented, affordable.

con: too sticky,

Sephora Rouge Infusion Lip Stain

Sephora Lip Stain

actually, I have bought this baby on December. however, I have only been loving this for the past few weeks.

here it goes: Sephora Rouge Infusion Lip Stain. I have in shade Red Essence 10.


I am not a fan of dark, bold lippies, and it is actually the first time I have tried applying this, and it is actually pretty good although it is not my cup of tea.

the lip stain itself is pretty pigmented and easy to apply because of the small sponge brush. it smells funny, tho, it smells like chemical. it does not last until 10 hours. I applied it on 5 pm, I ate, and I had to retouch it on 8 pm because it wore off and it made my lips chapped. I also notice that the color is darker than the first time I applied it. I wonder will it keep changing or not, because d’oh it is dark enough for me, I cannot stand any more vampy look.

Ione thing that I like is it does not leave a stain on cigs and glass. the formula is also pigmented, I only need one or two swatches on my lips to get the perfect look.


pro: pigmented, okay to apply on dry lips without any balm, affordable (14$).

con: the color is changing for the 1st apply thru the 2nd, and most likely it will keep changing.

Someone asked me what I felt during my last break up.

Ugh. It is going to get ugly.

Honestly we were done way before I flipped out last night. But what I felt when I broke up, I still remembered. Coming out of a 2 years of serious relationship wasnt easy. So let me try to write it down.

Before the break up, I was entering the phase “all the love was still there I just did not know what to do with it now”. Sometimes, you woke up and you just knew that you could not do this anymore. However, I made a pact that I would never ask for a break-up. I still honored it tho.

Sadly, no matter how hard I (we) tried, we still entered the phase “sometimes love just aint enough”. When we met directly, we were both happy. When we were not seeing each other, all I (or we, I dunno) felt was this numbness which started to growl and diverse throughout your mind and soul. We had differences in our way of thinking, and no matter how hard we tried to walk in between we just could not seem to shake it off. And then it got into his mind, what I had promised I would not ask him to. We had to break up.

And then it got into the phase “nobody said it was easy, no one ever said it would be so hard” because we knew we loved each other but we just could not do this anymore. Just because it was the right thing to do does not mean it did not hurt like hell. I lost my half of life for these past 2 years. I lost the one who popped first everytime I woke up and right before I went to bed. It almost felt like I lost my bestfriend, because my world revolved around him, literally. It was hard. I found it hard to just breathe everytime I woke up and realized I would not see those texts saying ‘I love you’. It was hard going home alone without someone picking you up or waiting for you to get home safe and sound. It was hard to fall asleep without someone comforting you by phone after a long tiring day.

It was hard. So hard. Like really hard.

Eventually, things got better, like it always is. Coming out of a 2 years of serious relationship is indeed hard, but it also makes you discover yourself again. I was always so devoted to my partner until it got to a point where we both changed ourselves for each other. Breaking up gives you a chance to know yourself again. It unlocks new door that leads to a new path. After all, it is just another phase in life I have to keep on living.

Hello Flawless’ Dupe!

Okayyyyy gue seneng banget belakangan karena akhirnyaaaa…. gue nemuin dupenya Benefit Hello Flawless Oxygen Wow! Say hello to my new baby: Loreal Lucent Magique

jadiii ceritanya gue ke Loreal pengen nyobain True Match, tapi mbak mbaknya bilang gue pake ini aja karena gue masih muda. Ini lebih enteng. Yaudah akhirnya gue terbujuk beli ini (lagian harganya murah, 110000 IDR kayanya deh ga rugi) dan saat gue coba di rumaaah…… maaan ini mirip banget sama benefit guee!!!! dan warnanya juga sama persis (gue pake Petal di Benefit dan no7 di Loreal) tapi harganya seperlimanya benefit :””””))))) gimana sih rasanya jadi gue? pengen nyium mba spg loreal rasanyah!!
recommended banget asli. coveragenya medium tapi buildable, but I must say coveragenya lebih bagus dari Benefit :O gue agak shock dan sedih sih. entengnya samaa, tapi awetan benefit sih beda 1-2 jaman doang. blendable bangeeeet palagi pake blender/sponge. serius deh ini foundation murah+bagus. repurchase fix! Gue jadi menganaktirikan Benefit gue karena sedih gitu gasih udah tinggal setengah 🙁 dan kalo beli lagi gue kudu nyiapin kocek setengah juta lebih, sedangkan gue lagi berjuang sepenuh hati buat beli sephora make up academy. huft. thank you Loreal for creating this foundie :”))